Funny!! Mom on Amy's Answering Machine

Now, I nearly just split my sides...

Moms' jobs are to be, well, moms. My own mother's wonderful at it!! But my mom should never, ever feel like she's being too much of a mom after she listens to this! (I had first heard it a couple of years ago, but lemme tell you, it's still a major hoot!!)

Standup comic Amy Borkowsky's mom is, um, just a smidgen overprotective, as you can tell from the hundreds of messages she's left on Amy's answering machine:

(Beep.) “Amila? . . . I wanted to know if you by any chance happened to catch the story on the new squirting scam. Apparently, the way it works is, you’ll be walking along the street and, unbeknownst to you, some guy or maybe a woman will squirt you from behind with a bottle of ketchup. Then, someone else who’s in cahoots with that person will say, 'Excuse me, miss, but there’s some ketchup on your sweater.' And then just as you go to wipe it, they grab your bag and that’s the end of that. I just figured I’d mention it, so if somebody tries to point out any ketchup on you, you’ll be wise to it, and you can just say something like, 'I’m well aware of the ketchup -- in fact, it matches my pants that have a big blob of relish.'” (from Amy's Answering Machine: Messages from Mom)

Don't miss hearing Amy's Answering Machine stories which have aired on NPR, including Amy's mom's actual messages!

Plus, enjoy listening to other samples of Amy's mom from her answering machine:

• Department of Motor Vehicles
• Lambskin Condoms
• Emergency Exit

And, just in time for Christmas, there's the official Amy's mom CDs and book! Enjoy!!

Categories: Humor